For many years I would find myself in situations surrounded by confident, grounded, and high-achieving individuals. In these situations, I would shrink up into my stomach. There would be a weight on my shoulders. A ball in my throat. And when addressed I would make a comment that was either self-deprecating or overly agreeable.
If you have experienced this before, you probably suffer from ๐ฝ๐ฒ๐ผ๐ฝ๐น๐ฒ ๐ฝ๐น๐ฒ๐ฎ๐๐ถ๐ป๐ด and/or ๐๐ฎ๐น๐ถ๐ฑ๐ฎ๐๐ถ๐ผ๐ป ๐๐ฒ๐ฒ๐ธ๐ถ๐ป๐ด. This stops you from being yourself. From being confident in all social situations.From being a leader in your life. In basic terms, my value around these “high value” individuals would DROP. And it would be freaking painful and depressing. So what changed? It was my ability to ๐ฟ๐ฒ๐ฎ๐ฑ ๐๐ผ๐ฐ๐ถ๐ฎ๐น ๐พ๐๐ฒ๐๐ฒ๐.
Part of developing your self-esteem in social situations is by increasing your social intelligence. When you can learn how to read even the subtlest social queues, your confidence will naturally go up.
Why? Because then you are one step ahead of everyone in conversations. You can positively steer them towards fun, connection, and rapport. And you won’t be CLUELESS when somebody makes a witty or sarcastic comment. You will be SHARP. So if you feel awkward af in social situations, this could be why!
Social intelligence and reading people can be learned. Don’t settle.